Tuesday, May 29, 2007

And I made it home….

I made it out alive !! Surgery went well. I was unfortunately cut from hip to hip to discover a hematoma and adhesions on my lower intestine. The good news is that I got a mini tummy tuck.. the doctor cut two and a half inches of skin out of my stomach. Thank you Doctor !! I spent 2 nights in the hospital and was a pretty good patient. It is damn hard to get rest in the hospital when every hour some random nurse comes in to check vital signs, give antibiotics, more fluids, and take blood. Hubby was like always an amazing man and came and spent hours and hours with me in the hospital. I came home Thursday very sleepy and sore. The ride home from the hospital was a bitch. Where is my Cadillac when I need it? Most of my days are spent in bed.. however, today I felt good enough to sit on the patio with the lap top and watch the kids swim !! How badly I want to get in and enjoy the water with them. I hope that in a few weeks I will be able to. I am off work as per the doctor’s orders for 6 weeks. No vacuuming, laundry, lifting, anything not even driving for another week. Hopefully this is that last surgery until I get my knees replaced when I am in my 70’s

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Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Out for another surgery

After many visits to the doctor’s office and several visits to the emergency room I FINALLY got someone to listen to me. In 2 hours I am going to have another surgery. I will be cut from hip to hip in order to remove a giant abscess or cyst .. They don’t know what it is. All I know is that I want the fucker OUT!!
I am a bit nervous as I know how bad it sucks to be cut wide open like that and the healing process is a slow one.. And I have to stay in the hospital for a few days (I am not into sleepovers and become grumpy rather quickly when every other hour someone comes in to check blood pressure and to draw blood) however, I will do my best to be a good patient and say please and thank you…

I am hoping that this is it and I will soon be on the mend (for real) ……

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Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I am tired… and still sick …

I have been living on a liquid diet for several days now.. ( before that it was yogurt and apples) I have lost 33 pounds in just under 5 weeks. The Doctors do not have an acceptable answer for me as to why I get so sick when I eat, why I have such a high temperature ( on average 102-103) or why I am losing weight so quickly ......what the hell ??? is that not their jobs ? damn

Mom has been helpful .. she refers to her Natural Guide to Healing and mixes up potions and herbs for me. love ya mom ...She hates doctors just as much as I do … half of them are quacks and cannot be trusted ….

I need to find me a voodoo doc or something

I got my blood work back from the Doctor and was told that my body is lacking all the necessary nutrients and if I can’t raise the levels, I will have to be checked in the hospital so that they can do it for me so that my body does not shut down. My triglycerides, electrolytes, liver, white blood cell count and whatever the hell else is all out of whack

I am anemic, nauseated and feel like a raving bitch ~~

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Friday, May 11, 2007

Randomness # 45

* It is so difficult to get my ass out of bed each work day when the alarm goes off.. some days I glance at the digital time and think in my head ??“ that can’t be right”?? I have been getting up early and going to work for years.. you would think that it would get easier.. it hasn’t ..I hear that when I get “older” it will get easier to get up so damn early in the morning. I will be retired by then.. so I guess that I will get up early and feed the damn birds..

* I work with someone that every time I hear her laugh, I want to shove a pencil in my ear.

* I hate it when someone makes you laugh.. you know a serious all out laugh then that moment comes when you start to cry .. it makes me so damn confused..

* I have been told 4 times in the last 3 days “ you look sick, Did you lose some weight?” I have just learned to come back with “you look like shit.. have you gained some weight?” then they try and smooth things over telling me that they were trying to give me a complement. Bullshit

* Yesterday on my way home, I saw a man sitting in his garage, drinking a beer in a plaid short sleeve shirt and his tighty whities.

* Each year around this time I want to get another tattoo.. .

* I need a vacation by the ocean… Do I know anyone that lives by the ocean ??

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Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Say What ?


One of the many issues that was discovered during my ER visit a week ago was that my liver enzymes were “extremely elevated”
I believe that is bad because the emergency room doctors and nurses came rushing in to my little ER cubicle and started panicking over me. Due to this I have been taken off ALL my medication. Now to the average person this would not be such a bad thing. For me it sucks .. all I can say is


Mood Stabilization Medication


I need this medication so that I …


a) Don’t burn the building down then laugh hysterically
b) Stab someone in the eye
c) Have 14 panic attacks a day
d) Can smile and say “Good Morning!!” when I really am thinking “Fuck Off!!”

Oh the list goes on and on ...
It has been a week since I have had my medication… this is bad.. very bad .... I go today to get my blood work checked again and am hoping that all will be well... because I have already used my “get out of jail for free” card.

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Friday, May 04, 2007

I made it … ALIVE….

After not eating for 5 days, a long ass scary visit to the ER.. and a passing out episode, I think that I will be ok … at least that is what they tell me. I will not go into the nasty details… but things are looking better .. and I am glad that I went to the ER because I am not sure that I would still be here today if I had not gone… thank you for all your well wishes and advice !! I am on the mend .. again

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Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Still not feelin' better

I am so fucking frustrated I can’t see straight. I in no way want to turn this into my trauma/surgery/pain blog but sadly this is what it is becoming.
I had surgery 25 days ago. I returned to work 2 weeks after surgery .. what the fuck was I thinking ?…..
About 8 days after surgery I actually started to feel better. I could feel my body healing. I could tell that I was on the mend .. Not any more , now I am at a point where I fucking hurt.. It hurts to walk , sit, sit up, cough, laugh, sneeze and sex… NO , It seems like I am going in reverse. It is depressing as hell. The doc told me 15 days ago that in 10 days I should feel 100%. Well guess what doc.. I feel like shit.. still …..
When I had my appendix out the recovery time on that was slicker than snot and was back to my normal bitchy self within 3 weeks… shouldn’t I start feeling better? 25 days should be plenty of time.. My stomach is so damn tender that I can barley touch it.. it is all fat and bloated.. I am not feeling sexy …not at all.
I don’t know if I should go to the ER or not. Most of the time they just look at me all bewildered and say that everything looks normal .. then after I return to the ER 3 or more times… THEN they discover something and it is a huge rush to fix whatever is wrong with me.
The last time that this happened .. I waited days and days in pain.. I went to the ER and was told that if I would have waited an hour longer I would have died.. now that is some serious shit… I do not feel as bad as I did back then but I DO feel pretty bad. I have had a temperature that has ranged from 99 to 102 that started 9 days after surgery it was 102.4 yesterday and 101.9 this morning.
I am exhausted, I am tired of putting on my happy face at work, tired of explaining to random people WHY I STILL do not feel better When I do not know myself , tired of NOT feeling better.
I have had 9 surgeries where they cut me hip to hip and And 25 days later could actually feel myself getting better. I am thinking infection but I am not sure… I just don’t know what to do. I have had my fair share of surgeries and know my body well enough to know that something is very wrong here.

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Sleep

I feel like the pain will never end.. I am thinking of how I can convince the Dr to put me in a coma for about 4 weeks.. then maybe I would be able to wake up pain free and a couple pounds lighter..

Sounds like a pretty good idea to me …yes it does….

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ABOUT ME
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MJ

I am me .. that is all there is to it.

I am Fun, Pushy, Unpredictable, Vain, Confident, Expressive, Patronizing, Pompous, Bossy, Courageous, Romantic, Dramatic, Loyal, Determined, Lofty, Stubborn and Exhausted!!

Read at your own risk and Love it!

MJ


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