I don’t want to grow up ….
Remember when mom told you that you should enjoy your youth because it will be gone before you know it and all that you could think was what the hell do you know about being a youth? You are 200 years old .. it sucks .. I just want to do whatever I want when I want it and if I want to go to Amy’s house I can drive my damn self??
One night I was planning on sneaking out after my parents went to bed.. I spent hours getting ready hair.. makeup.. clothes… It was getting late and I was ready to make the big escape when mom poked her head in to say goodnight .. SHIT .. !!!..!!!
Mom.. Why are you all dressed up ?
Me.. UM
Me.. well tomorrow is picture day at school I am just trying out different looks to make sure that I look extra good tomorrow
I am a genius !!!
Once I had a great epiphany
if I burned incense while I was smoking in my room with the window cracked …then no one would know because the incense would hide the smell ….so I lit up the incense then lit up my smoke … smoking so fast that the cherry was two inches long (that is no way to smoke.. unless you are 14) I had just put out my smoke when in walks mom
Mom.. what is that smell ?
as she is trying to locate me in the smoke filled room….
Me.. I um ….just lit this incense and it is the match that you are smelling
Mom.. Do you think that I was born yesterday?
Me. Nope
Mom.. then what is that smell
Me.. well if you were not just born yesterday then you know what it is
Mom.. you are grounded .. something …something….. something
I kinda blocked out the rest
Also being an only child sucks because you have not one other person to blame things on …not one
Dad…Who drank all this Jack Daniels ?
Me.. I don’t know
Dad.. Did you drink it ?
Me.. No
Dad… well I did not drink it and your mom did not drink it so that only leaves you
Me thinking ….. I am FUCKED
2 Comments:
There's just no plausible deniability as the only child, eh? Cute.
The JD one was hysterical. Fucked. That's a good term for it.
CP.
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