Why?
Because I have reached my personal limit of weight on my shoulders…..Because I am exhausted.. Because I feel like I have nothing more to give..Because sometimes I don’t know what to do with my emotions… Because I can only put on my happy face for so long ……
That is why
Because you crack my ass up T Mobile
Damn you KRAFT ….You should never change a good thing …
To the whom it may concern,
Two years ago I was on the hunt for a new breakfast cereal.. I saw your catchy commercial… and decided that I would give your cereal .. Honey bunches of oats… a try.. I purchased 3 boxes. Original, Peach and strawberry.. One spoonful was all it took!!! It WAS a mouthful of joy.. It really was !!!
Strawberry was my favorite.. the clusters of oats.. the corn flakes , the crisp not too sweet strawberries … it was like a celebration in my mouth !! Perfect !! I have consumed a bowl full almost every morning faithfully for two years.
But there is no longer any celebrating going on... There is no more joy.. the fun stoped last week when....
I noticed that I had run out of my favorite breakfast cereal.. I went to my local grocery store and bought 4 boxes.
As I poured a bowl, I was full of anticipation .. but wait… I noticed something was different …My cereal that I have eaten for 2 years now looks .... well .... not the same as it did the other 730 times I have poured myself a bowl ..I could not figure out what exactly was different until I poured the milk and ate it …. .. the strawberries got all squishy and gross .. the clusters of oats were pinkish… I like my oats to be oat colored. Remember clear Pepsi?? Green ketchup.. That did not go over well because well.. as an American I need my Pepsi to be cola colored and my ketchup to be red.. Those are just the facts there … PERIOD
What have you done KRAFT? Why did you go and try to make a change to a perfect thing? At first I thought maybe someone in your manufacturing plant had a bad day and was hoping, praying ... just the one box was like that so I opened the other 3 boxes that I purchased.. ALL the same
FUCK !!
I am not telling you how to run your business .. HOWEVER…. If you are going to make those kind of corporate decisions, you should consider say maybe ..Advertising ??!!??….There was no difference in the packaging no “New and Improved” on the box.. nothing… I am very disappointed…
And now I am on the hunt again for a breakfast cereal that will bring back the mouthful of joy.
Decisions Decisions
Keep it long .. or cut the shit off?? And damn I need to get it colored AGAIN ……….. Some days it sucks to be a girl ………….
Why you should not eat your friend’s homemade sushi
We were invited to a friends for sushi dinner last night … Tuna, crab, avocado, cucumber, sea weed.... you know the basic spread.. the fish was very tasty.. However….
1. I am sick
2. Did I say that I am sick
3. Seaweed is for animals.. not humans … that shit is nasty
I can still taste the sea weed today … this is not a good thing ……
From now on.. I will leave it up to the professional’s thanks
Reason 876 why you should always wear your wedding ring to Wal-Mart
We got all moved into our new place … thank god … I had removed my wedding ring in the moving process because I have already broken it 3 times … see how responsible I can be??
It had snowed 4 times last week and our north facing driveway was completely snow packed..
I needed to get some ice melt from Wal-Mart
It is winter .. In Utah … Ice melt should be by the FRONT door … but no…….
As I am making my second lap around the store .. I hear a man behind me talking to his daughter…
Man: We can look at the toys after I find the ice melt..
I turn around to find a man in his late 30’s sportin a full on mullet… NICE …… I say to the man … “well when you find it .. let me know” …
Man: sure thing darlin’
Ok so I hate it when complete strangers call me darlin’
Surprise surprise .. I am irritated at this point
I hunt down a friendly Wal-Mart employee and ask where the fuck the ice melt is in this store…
Mullet man is following me like a lost puppy
She kindly points me to the lawn and garden section .. you know the one .. where they sell flowers and garden shit in the summer…. That is a perfectly logical place to put the ice melt … nice one Wal-Mart
Alas !!! I have located the ice melt … I am about to grab a 50 pound bag when ….. WAIT……
Mullet man thinks that I am unable to lift an absurd 50 lb bag of ice melt.. he rushes around me and picks up the bag and places it in my cart…
Me: thank you
Man: you are very welcome baby doll….
What the fuck did you just call me ??? ( ok so I did not say it but I totally thought it)
I leave the lawn and garden section and grab some other needed items… and head to the check out
As I am standing in line … I hear a man talking to his daughter… I turn around and it is none other than dun da na naaaa mullet man…
Him: Hey... if you want me to follow you out to your car.. I can help you put the ice melt in your trunk…
Then rape and kill you …. No he did not say that .. but he was thinking it … :)
Me: I have got it thanks
Him: Well a pretty girl like you should not have to lift that heavy bag
Me: Famous “fuck you” look and nervous laughter
Him: My name is Don and this is my daughter Lexy
Me: My name is MJ and I have 14 children…. I think I can manage a 50 lb bag of ice melt… Thanks
I swear if I see him on Americas Most Wanted I totally will call for the reward money …
Party like a … What ? Happy Birthday Choll
My first annual invite to Cholls Birthday bash …. I had a blast !!
A bunch of brunettes …
Ro and Bear  Guess which one of us is drunk …..  Me helping Will rock some mod sexy hair ..  Squinshin’ on the couch ... I totally had a great time … and was not even drunk ... I know ..I know ... somebody write it down somewhere quick *Ü* I can’t wait to come back and show you my mad Rock Band skills...However I will be requiring at least a bottle of wine if I am handed the microphone !!
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MJ
I am me .. that is all there is to it.
I am Fun, Pushy, Unpredictable, Vain, Confident, Expressive, Patronizing, Pompous, Bossy, Courageous, Romantic, Dramatic, Loyal, Determined, Lofty, Stubborn and Exhausted!!
Read at your own risk and Love it!
Miss Doxie
Jurgen Nation
The Art of Time Suckage
The Morning Meeting
Certifiable Princess
Chollyson
Amalah
Animal Mind
Much a do about sumthin
Alan thinks
Tiny Voices in my head
My reflecting pool
Weapon of mass instruction
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